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COMING OFF DRUGS: RELAPSES AFTER LONG-TERM SOBRIETY
Unfortunately, chemical dependence is a relapsing illness, no matter how long you have been clean and sober. As we have said before, the susceptibility to drugs or drink remains. An addict or an alcoholic is never cured.
Relapses often occur when NA or AA members begin to take sobriety for granted. They stop working at the Twelve Steps and feel that they have their drugs or drink problem beaten for ever. Sometimes they drift away from meetings. At other times they keep up their meetings, but it is merely surface compliance.
Sometimes they simply get bored with NA or AA. Occasional periods of boredom or disenchantment do not matter as long as you keep going to meetings and remember why you are there. One easy cure for boredom is to get involved in helping addicts or alcoholics who are still using drugs or still drinking. It reminds you how lucky you are to be clean and sober.
There is a very quick check you can run on yourself any time that you begin to feel bored or disenchanted with NA or AA. Ask yourself the following questions.
1. Do I have a home NA or A A group?
If not, why not? The advantage of regular attendance at the same NA meeting is that people get to know you and you can get close to them. Because they know you, they are likely to notice if your thinking is moving away from the Twelve-Step programme. They will also notice odd behaviour. That way, they may be able to warn you in time if you are drifting towards a relapse.
2. Am I in regular touch with my sponsor?
The idea of having a sponsor is that you have somebody who knows all about you to whom you can talk if difficulties arise. It’s no good having a sponsor whom you never see or never talk to (though you need not be ringing them ceaselessly). If you haven’t got a sponsor, does it mean that you think you can manage without one? Or that you don’t want somebody to know all about you?
3. Am I working on the Twelve Steps?
You don’t have to be a saint, but you should be leading a life which more or less conforms to your and other members’ interpretation of the Twelve Steps. If you have decided that you can do without them, then you are risking much unhappiness. Is there something in your life that you are not feeling good about? Resentments, self-pity, guilty secrets or defiant behaviour could all be signs that you are heading for trouble.
4. What am I doing for the addict or alcoholic who still suffers? Helping other addicts and alcoholics is an essential part of recovery, and if you are not doing it, you are taking risks with your own sobriety. You can help others by volunteering for Twelve-Step calls, doing volunteer, phone duty, helping run a meeting, helping order literature, taking care of the tea and coffee, or putting out the chairs for a meeting. Practical involvement in NA or AA should be continued, for without it you put your sobriety at grave risk. Not being regularly involved may be the first sign that you are drifting away.
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